ANNOUNCEMENTS

VIRTUALLY HERS came out Oct. 2009. Get it at SAMHAIN Publishing. VIRTUALLY ONE coming soon.
VIRTUALLY HERS OUT IN PRINT AUG 2010.

I've also made available at Amazon BIG BAD WOLF a COS Commando book, an earlier manuscript about Killian Nicholas Langley. You can sample the first five chapters right here. EBOOK now available for KINDLE, NOOK, and at SMASHWORDS for $4.99.

I appreciate all your emails. If you'd like to buy Virtually His NEW, please contact me. Thank you.



CLICK:

Big Bad Wolf Author's Note/CH. 1

Big Bad Wolf CH. 2

Big Bad Wolf Ch. 3

(more chapters on left side bar below)



To read excerpts of VIRTUALLY HERS, scroll down & click on the links on the right.



EMAIL ME AT JENN AT GENNITA-LOW DOT COM


VIRTUALLY HERS UPDATE

VIRTUALLY HERS OUT IN PRINT AUG 2010! Discounted at Amazon!

To read & comment on the poll (left column), click HERE. Thank you for all the wonderful posts there!

UPDATE: I SOLD THE SERIES TO SAMHAIN!

Here's your UBER VIRTUALLY HERS YAK THREAD!


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Saturday, November 28, 2009

Bet You've Never Read About This Were/Shifter!

I was googling and researching for a "cute" sidekick for my (urban fantasy pseudo-satire) Viking Dude heroine (demon slayer). Cute with a little bit of magic, I thought. Hmm. Shifter abilities? Okay, of course. Maybe give him an Asian background? Why not? Something embarassing about him to be revealed later? Oh yeah, that sounds like fun.

Muse was having a bit of fun with me.

Then I found the entry on the Japanese TANUKI, a rodent-dog shapeshifter with humongous balls. Cute and sidekickish, yes! So I googled some more, looking at pictures and already playing with plotlines and jokes.

Then I saw this Japanese commercial below, a KIDDIE commercial. Wait for the ending. Wow. I don't remember this in my version of Red Riding Hood ;-). You'd think the big bad wolf might have changed his menu after seeing that!



All she said was "Wow." Wow?!



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Friday, November 27, 2009

Post #2: Thanksgiving Dick

From Failblog.com. Tell me which part of this cake would you like to eat? *g*





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Thanksgiving With Breakdancing Spartans


1) Killer Mixer -- glug sip glug

2) Turkey, potatoes, fried rice, butterscotch soup, bread, stuffing, gravy, drippings, sweet potato souffle

3) Pumpkin pie, coconut pie, pecan pie

4) coffee

5) Breakdancing Spartans. Watched spoof of 300 (with an almost nekkid KEVIN SORBO)--MEET THE SPARTANS.



PERFECT ending to Thanksgiving.

I'm done.

How did yours go?

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Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving!

It's Thanksgiving here tomorrow and many of my American readers will be with family and close friends, having dinner and great conversation. I want to wish every one of you a Happy Thanksgiving!

Some of us have the tradition to list things we're thankful about this year. I like doing this--it gives perspective on what is important and what I've been blessed with. This year, I'm thankful

1) for holding on to my writing dream and not giving up, especially on the Virtual/Super Soldier Spy series Books 2 and 3.

2) to the angel/higher power who "caught" me while I was falling off the roof. I don't know of any other way to explain how I ended up on a concrete deck with such minor injuries after that whack on the head.

3) for the extra time with my two older furbabies. Again, I thank the higher power that somehow made me change my mind about staying overnight at Charleston that night in Aug. and instead convinced me to drive straight home. Because of that decision, I was in time to save Miracle, who, once again, lived up to her namesake. I've been very, very vigilantly taking care of them since both their hearts and kidneys aren't 100 percent.

4) for great readers like you who have been so supportive and generous all this time. Thank you for buying my books and playing a big part in keeping my dream alive.

What are you thankful for this year?



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Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Write On

An interesting video made at the NBA (National Book Awards) ceremony by Galley Cat (http://www.mediabistro.com/) of finalists' giving advice on surviving the bad economy. Most of them say the same thing I do: "We're poor anyway!" ;-)



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Sunday, November 22, 2009

Harlequin Horizon All Links All Weeklong!

For most readers, nothing's happening, so don't worry, carry on with the Thanksgiving menus and preparation.

For most romance writers, a big deal happened since mid-last week, when Harlequin Enterprises, the world's biggest publisher, announced that they were going to monitize their slush piles by sending the rejected writers to their new publishing line, Harlequin Horizons. Much explosions ensued.

If you want to catch up with the saga and have the time, here are the links to fill your writerly hours:

1) HQ happily announces HH, the new line. (Look! Shiny! For a price, you too can be a Harlequin author!)

2) Wherein PW, New Yorker, the Examiner, and even NYT weighed in.

-->In Which The Examiner Pronounced Harlequin "Regressing" Into Vanity Pub

--> New York Times Mocks Romance Writers

--> The New Yorker Makes Fun of Romance Writers as Harlequin Hacks and Writing Romance as "Masturbatory"

As you can see, this is NOT a good thing for a romance writer and a romance writing organization to read about to start their day. It's already a given that people make fun of romance writers and romance as a genre. But when your own #1 publisher is the cause of this new mockery? Very painful and disappointing.

Let me explain that writing organizations are non-profit and function to educate and protect writers who want to make a career out of writing. These organizations do it through by-laws and local chapters, teaching those who are interested the different ways they can market their manuscripts.

The first thing we learn as writers is that money FLOWS to the author, not the other way. That means, you don't pay anyone--not an agent, not a "publisher"--to publish your work; they pay you.

Any agent who rejects your manuscript and then charges money for a publishing service (meaning, you pay $$$ to get edited or $$$ to be published) is kicked out from the Agent's Association.

Any publisher that charges you to publish your work, with false promises of distribution (when there is none), keeps the copyright, splits your royalties and/or make you buy your own books for distribution is a vanity publisher. How does one distinguish a vanity publisher from a self-publishing/Print-on-demand (POD) service? Simple. A self-publishing service allows you to copyright your own work. A self-publishing service is basically a PRINTING service--you upload your own work; you design your own product; you control the quality of the book; you keep the copyright. The service charges you for each printed book and take this expense out of the price you set. There are no thousands of dollars involved.

*NOTE. There is nothing wrong with self-publishing. I've done it with Big Bad Wolf. At the same time, I know that this is not recognized by my organization because of its by-laws, the Romance Writers of America, so I don't promote the book there.

I understand the reasoning behind this rule. If RWA allowed one self-pub into its organization, then every self-pub and vanity-pub will be eligible. There won't be any gatekeeper against the scammers who charge an arm and a leg. A writing organization must have rules to keep publishing a professional process. Can you imagine your Uncle Tom wanting to sign his un-edited and un-vetted romance at RWA because he "published" it and bought 200 copies that are now sitting in his garage?

(ETA. This is not to say there aren't great self-published authors out there. So don't come here and start that old lecture about self-publishing is a matter of choice, etc., 'kay? I respect self-published authors who have done their homework and who understand the difference between vanity publishing and doing-it-oneself; they work very hard on making their books a professional product. I'm talking about those business fronts that slap a name and title on any unedited manuscript and charge the author big sums of money after making false promises that it'll be marketed like a traditionally pubbed book)

Thus RWA, MWA (Mystery Writers of America), and SFWA (Science Fiction Writers of America) acted swiftly. RWA and SFWA took Harlequin off their eligible publishers list, a move that was akin to the shot heard around the world. Because, you know, Harlequin aka Romance Publisher King. Harlequin also publishes many suspense and mystery lines. Here are the RWA, MWA and SFWA's strongly worded announcements:

Harlequin No Longer Eligible

Author and industry blogs exploded. Many examined the Harlequin Horizon (now being called by some, Har Ho or HQHo--oh Harlequin, how could you not have foreseen the snarkage of this name?) and broke down all the monetary details of this new vanity service. Even well-known agents weighed in.

-->The best line-by-line of Har Ho's charges of their services by by Falconesse, who calculated, using Har Ho's numbers, that it would cost a writer $7930 for them to edit his/her 90,000 word manuscript. That's not counting the promotional and distribution charges, folks. And oh, the $20,000 extra if you want a minute/two length Hollywood trailer (starring who, I say? Nekkid George Clooney?)

-->Excellent breakdown of why Har Ho is misleading by author Jackie Kessler

-->A humorous conversation between Har Ho and potential client by author Jackie Kessler

-->Agent Ashley Grayson compares Har Ho to Bernie Madoff and his Ponzi scheme. He didn't mince words.

All of this led to Harlequin making another public announcement to RWA, stating that

It is disappointing that the RWA has not recognized that publishing models have and will continue to change. As a leading publisher of women’s fiction in a rapidly changing environment, Harlequin’s intention is to provide authors access to all publishing opportunities, traditional or otherwise.


which led to a great John Scalzi translation, calling Harlequin's defense as "putting lipstick on a con job."

There are people defending Harlequin's new venture, of course. Two notable ones are

1) HQ Editor Stacy Boyd who can't discuss about her employer, Harlequin, but will tell you that self-publishing is the newest, most interesting thing. I have to note here that her inability to talk about HQ really makes the title of her post, OMG RWA!, moot, since what's the point of berating a writing organization berating your own employer that you can't offend/defend/discuss about to your blog commenters?

But you must scroll down and read the many popular authors who came to publicly make their concerns known.

2) Kat Meyer at Net Galley who wonders what these writing organizations are "so afraid of?" She points out that writers should be given the chance to try a new publishing model since everyone agrees that the old one is broken.

This model is apparently opposite of Yog's Law, which is, "money flows from publisher to the author," because the moment someone pointed that out, publisher Michael Hyatt (from Thomas Nelson, publisher of Christian books, which also has a similar vanity-press deal with Author Solutions/also now taken off RWA eligible publishers list) chimed in the comments:

Where is this etched in stone? We have sellers and we have buyers. Sometimes the publisher buys; sometimes the publisher sells. The same is true of the author.

thus reinforcing the point that yeah, publishers are thinking about not paying authors any more (And yeah, that's why authors are worried about their future.)
The best comment on the thread belonged to the wonderful author, Laura Kinsale. Here's a teeny excerpt:

Ya know, I’m just tired of being lectured about all the “oh oh the future, yer doin it wrong now, oh look, shiny!”

The problem is, this vanity stuff ISN’T a shiny new business model. It’s older than the hills.Instead of making money off of readers buying books, it’s making money off of writers printing books.

Click on Kat Meyer's link, scroll down, and read the awesome rest.

Because of the general meshing of self-publishing and vanity publishing, this whole thing got a bit side-tracked here and there on the Intertubes with self-publishing authors coming in to defend their choices. Nora Roberts gave her opinion about Harlequin's venture:

...it’s a different matter, when a big brand publisher uses its name and its resources to sell this as dream fulfillment, advertises it as such while trying to claim it’s not really their brand being used to make money on mss they’ve rejected as not worthy of that brand in the first place."

and received a lecture from Zoe Winters about the state of publishing.

Roberts and Winters Gunfight

(cue The Good The Bad The Ugly theme song)
Zoe Winters: "I’m happy that traditional publishing has worked out for you like it has....But this isn’t the story of most people. You are like the hope that keeps everybody running on the same pointless (for most) treadmill."

Nora Roberts: ''I do wish when I participate in these discussions, I wouldn’t see a response along the lines of: Easy for you to say when you’re Nora. It does negate my opinion and my participation. And a word of advice? If you’re serious about ending ‘a pissing contest’ don’t continue to piss."

Kapow! Kapow! (my edited version)

And that's all the links to keep you busy for today. Till further development, I'll leave you with the inevitable Har Ho Spoof:

Small Beer Press/Horizon Imprint (YOU MUST VISIT!)

Next? Maybe I'll share with you my experience with Scam/Vanity Publishers when I was a newly beginning writer hoping to be published.

Happy reading!

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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Who Has The Baddest Balls? RWA or HQ or Mr. Scurrilous Scrotum?

Knew the title would get your attention ;-).

The Net is a cool place to hang out, especially if you have a community of friends who update you on the interesting things that happened/are happening while you are out and about trying to make a living. Today, I came home to find a few bits of surprising news in my email box, all of them somehow related to sets of balls. And I do mean THAT certain pair of balls.

1) Sneaky balls

Harlequin, the biggest name in the romance genre, announced a new division, a VANITY PUBLISHING line called Harlequin Horizon. A vanity publisher, in case you don't know, is a company that asks the writer to come up with $$$ to get published. The most famous one dating all the way back to the 50s is Vantage Press. You pay them a few thousand, and they'll print your books with your name in front and send them to you.

On the Harlequin Horizon website, they are charging any interested writers from $600-$2500 to get their books published. They are also offering book trailers for a very small fee of $20,000. (Me: Uh, yeah. They are obviously looking for very rich writers).

Harlequin's official stance is that this new line is not affiliated to Harlequin in any way. Just:

Pay no attention to all the new HHorizon logos on the eharlequin site. Or the links to the new site.

Pay no attention to the fact that rejected writers submitting to Harlequin editors are told that there is ANOTHER way to get published...through the non-affiliated Harlequin Horizon.

Pay no attention to little bait on the site teasing you that, if the book does well, Harlequin might* publish you for realz.

Very sneaky balls.

2) Brassy balls

This award goes to RWA, Romance Writers of America, a non-profit organization for romance writers 10000 members strong, many of whom are published HQ authors. Since the beginning, RWA and HQ are like BFF, with many of its original founding members the Grand Dames of Harlequin romance (Nora Roberts, Linda Howard, Sandra Brown, Anne Stuart, just to name a few). RWA and HQ are like butter on toast. Fish and chips. Tar and shingle (well, I have* to bring in a roofing comparison). Thanksgiving and turkey.

But not any more.

This evening, RWA has announced to its members that, due to HQ's new vanity/subsidy publishing line, it NO LONGER recognizes Harlequin as an RWA-approved publisher. RWA doesn't approve vanity publishing because it believes that a publisher should NOT charge a writer money for publishing them, that a writer must be protected from possible scams.

HQ is a big, big presence in RWA. At Nationals, many of its editors give workshops and appointments to RWA members who are given the opportunity to pitch their manuscript. There are also many published authors signing their HQ-published books. By no longer recognizing HQ, there will be no more publisher spotlights or workshops or appointments. Harlequin editors can still attend the conferences, but they'll no longer be comped.

It takes really BIG BRASSY BALLS to ban the Big Player. This decision will have many consequences that will affect authors/members in many ways, from insider knowledge of, and access to, a popular publisher, as well as the revered RITA award, given to published books. HQ is so big, they have several categories in the RITAs--I can't stop stressing the havoc HQ's ineligibity is going to bring.

c) Hottest Balls

I leave the most interesting for last ;-). None of the above balls is relevant to a reader who doesn't write or care to be published. The only balls they care about are real ones, especially if they belong on a sexy man. Ahem.

So therefore, who has the hottest, baddest balls?

Why, I submit to you: The Case of the Scurrilous Scrotum, belonging to a man who is fated to one day eat these Peter Peppers:



And that's your Mid-Week Hot News.



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Sunday, November 15, 2009

In Case of Emergency, Take Off Bra

Yup. You are looking at one of Time Magazine's FIVE WORST INVENTIONS OF 2009. This bra can save lives--yours and the lucky friend standing by you who isn't wearing a GAS MASK BRA.

See? This is a scientist demonstrating how to wear the GAS MASK BRA.


Question: But what if you have a tiny cup size? Would that be inadequate? OTOH, what if you have a QUAD ZZZ Cup size? Would that, like, cover the poor man's entire face?

The mind boggles, doesn't it? Don't I keep you inform about the neatest stuff?
Christmas present, mayhaps? Dear Santa, I would like a gas mask bra these holidays, please. Can it come with a pair of vibrating panties, please?

*G*



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Saturday, November 14, 2009

Apathy

I blame it on...

ROCK BAND



And also...because I wanted to pass on the Lady Gaga earworm to as many people as possible. Yeah, I'd rather do that than save the whales.



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Friday, November 13, 2009

Mammoth Book of Spec. Ops Cover

I like it! Very nummy. The book will be out next year too. What do you think?





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Wednesday, November 11, 2009

When Your Vajayjay Is Falling Out...

I have no words for this story. When I read it, my first reaction was OW! and as this woman's ordeal continued, it became OMG, and then just silent grimacing while crossing my legs. I don't suppose it ever occur to anyone that one's vagina could fall out of one's body, right?

Well, read on:

My Bits Fell Out!

She mentioned that she didn't go to the doctor for years because she was busy with her newborn and her other young child. I guess there was no romance, no intimate nookie with her husband that might have...umm...made her discovery sooner? I do understand how being a young parent with two kids could take up one's whole life, with no time for romance like the old days, but still, I'm left wondering the obvious. Husband--were you blind for a year too?!

Other than that, this woman now has a brand new vajayjay. I cracked up at the "of a thirteen year-old virgin" part. Um. What does a thirteen year-old virgin's...never mind. Not going there.



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Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Crackelistic New Moon Spoofs

Hey, Twilighters (yes, they have a name), the fun is just beginning for you guys!

Me, I'm just not into shiny twinkly emo-vampires, but my girlfriend's daughter and her gfs are. I've seen those mother-daughter Twilighters at the theatre. Scary. I want to eavesdrop on their breathy conversations about Edward Cullen and how sexy he is.

For those who enjoy a good laugh, there are a ton of New Moon spoofs out there. Thought I'd share some of my finds with you:





The Asian New Moon:



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Sunday, November 08, 2009

Yesterday's signing went really well--the mall was crowded and Barnes and Nobles and the coordinators from CFRWA did a wonderful job making sure everything ran like clockwork.

You can see two pages of event and author photos at Terry Odell's Website and also at Lucienne Diver's blog. I was yakking away with readers, shoppers and my table-partner, Pamela Labud, who writes paranormal historical and fantasy romance. It was also great seeing good buddies Bonnie Vanak, Linnea Sinclair, and Lucienne Diver.

I haven't been to the mall in a long time so it was interesting to people-watch as well as converse with interested and curious passers-by. CFRWA was giving out goodie bags--one's choice of naughty and nice--and I'm not surprised that the naughty ones disappeared a lot faster ;-). There was much laughter among the ladies when they were asked "naughty or nice," I tell you. Good times, good times.

When I got home, there was an email with the awesome news that Virtually Hers could be pre-ordered at Amazon!

Perfect end to a great day!

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Thursday, November 05, 2009

Central Fl. Romance Writers Bk Signing

I'll be signing with many fabulous authors this Saturday at Altamonte Springs (Orlando), Fl., from 2 to 5pm. Do come if you can!

The first 100 book buyers will receive a goody bag stuffed with autographed books and gifts!

For more information, click on this CFRW link.

Here's the mall address:
Altamonte Mall
451 East Altamonte Drive
Altamonte Springs,
Florida 32701
(407) 215-5100

I'll be giving free copies of Big Bad Wolf and Virtually His (hard to find since Mira doesn't sell print copies any more), so come on down! Do your holiday shopping ;-).

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Tuesday, November 03, 2009

New Moon, the Condensed Version

This is for those of us who are too busy to read the entire book by Stephanie Meyer:

New Moon, the Condensed Version

Thank you, Mandy, from Smexybooks for giving me a good chuckle this morning. Great use of dolls!

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Monday, November 02, 2009

Quick Announcements

After a whole month of struggling with moving the FYEO blog to a new server, EIGHT BALL and I can now post there again. Yay.

So, yes, we're back in the business of behind-the-scenes spy games and Eight Ball teasing. Sorry for the long delay since VHers came out. I'd wanted to have more fun stuff but since falling off the roof, I have been falling BEHIND in everything. Forgive me?

Also, I'm going to be on an internet talk radio show tomorrow! Will you join me? The show is called CANNED LAUGHTER AND COFFEE.

Readers can just go to http://www.blogtalkradio.com and log in to listen. A search for the show will bring them right to all that information. There is a call in number for listeners and also a live-chat message board so they can post comments.

I'll be on at 8.30pm for 15 minutes. I hope you can make it!

I'll update this post if there are any last minute changes, since I haven't done this before.

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DAILY DOSE OF CUTE PUPPINESS

Send My Publisher A Nudge