Crackelistic New Moon Spoofs

Hey, Twilighters (yes, they have a name), the fun is just beginning for you guys!

Me, I'm just not into shiny twinkly emo-vampires, but my girlfriend's daughter and her gfs are. I've seen those mother-daughter Twilighters at the theatre. Scary. I want to eavesdrop on their breathy conversations about Edward Cullen and how sexy he is.

For those who enjoy a good laugh, there are a ton of New Moon spoofs out there. Thought I'd share some of my finds with you:





The Asian New Moon:

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Yesterday's signing went really well--the mall was crowded and Barnes and Nobles and the coordinators from CFRWA did a wonderful job making sure everything ran like clockwork.

You can see two pages of event and author photos at Terry Odell's Website and also at Lucienne Diver's blog. I was yakking away with readers, shoppers and my table-partner, Pamela Labud, who writes paranormal historical and fantasy romance. It was also great seeing good buddies Bonnie Vanak, Linnea Sinclair, and Lucienne Diver.

I haven't been to the mall in a long time so it was interesting to people-watch as well as converse with interested and curious passers-by. CFRWA was giving out goodie bags--one's choice of naughty and nice--and I'm not surprised that the naughty ones disappeared a lot faster ;-). There was much laughter among the ladies when they were asked "naughty or nice," I tell you. Good times, good times.

When I got home, there was an email with the awesome news that Virtually Hers could be pre-ordered at Amazon!

Perfect end to a great day!

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Central Fl. Romance Writers Bk Signing

I'll be signing with many fabulous authors this Saturday at Altamonte Springs (Orlando), Fl., from 2 to 5pm. Do come if you can!

The first 100 book buyers will receive a goody bag stuffed with autographed books and gifts!

For more information, click on this CFRW link.

Here's the mall address:
Altamonte Mall
451 East Altamonte Drive
Altamonte Springs,
Florida 32701
(407) 215-5100

I'll be giving free copies of Big Bad Wolf and Virtually His (hard to find since Mira doesn't sell print copies any more), so come on down! Do your holiday shopping ;-).

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New Moon, the Condensed Version

This is for those of us who are too busy to read the entire book by Stephanie Meyer:

New Moon, the Condensed Version

Thank you, Mandy, from Smexybooks for giving me a good chuckle this morning. Great use of dolls!

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Quick Announcements

After a whole month of struggling with moving the FYEO blog to a new server, EIGHT BALL and I can now post there again. Yay.

So, yes, we're back in the business of behind-the-scenes spy games and Eight Ball teasing. Sorry for the long delay since VHers came out. I'd wanted to have more fun stuff but since falling off the roof, I have been falling BEHIND in everything. Forgive me?

Also, I'm going to be on an internet talk radio show tomorrow! Will you join me? The show is called CANNED LAUGHTER AND COFFEE.

Readers can just go to http://www.blogtalkradio.com and log in to listen. A search for the show will bring them right to all that information. There is a call in number for listeners and also a live-chat message board so they can post comments.

I'll be on at 8.30pm for 15 minutes. I hope you can make it!

I'll update this post if there are any last minute changes, since I haven't done this before.

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You Know You're Watching A Horror Movie When...

1) the girl goes down into the basement alone. In her flimsy nightie. Calling out, "Hello? Anyone down there?"

2) the car breaks down in the dark countryside and the boyfriend sees a light far off and tells the girl to stay in the car all by herself while he goes for help.

3) some kid in a mask starts coming after other kids. With a chainsaw.

4) a nice normal family moves into a dilapidated house with 500 rooms that still have strange looking pictures and other people's things everywhere.

5) the new girl in town wakes up to find a vampire boy staring obsessively at her while she sleeps. And he glitters.

6) when, for fun, the slumber party girls take out an ouija board. And the camera changes to Someone Else's POV.

7) when a doll so demonic-looking no child would own starts talking. And he sounds like a late-night talk host on drugs. And he can kill even though he's just 14 inches high.

8) when the archaeologist has been warned that whatever he's digging up is holy/sacred/cursed. And then eyes gleamed out of the mask/mummified body. Or the thing moved. And there's always a landslide at the end.

9) when a group of travelers--usually young and adventurous--go to visit the Forbidden Place--usually a cemetery or an abandoned town--and then rotting things with bloodied limbs and faroff gazes start hobbling after them. And the camera starts going all shaky.

10) the creepy caretaker--nurse/butler/maid--becomes more and more sinister till she turns stark crazy and cut off the guy's foot to make sure he can't get out of bed.

Any other creepy movie tropes you'd like to add?

Happy Halloweenie ;-D.

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Things Smaller & Yet Bigger Than Me

Today, I worked on a roof in a housing area that's next to designated wildlife sanctuary (meaning, you can't build on parts of the woods). Near evening, I sighted a group of six wild turkeys walking by with barely a glance in my direction, even though I was making quite a bit of noise with my nailgun.

Then, as I was packing up to leave, I caught sight of two deer about 15 feet away, just wandering in the neighbor's yard. You know how one suddenly just freeze up with delight at the sight of fragile wild creatures? So, there I was, standing three feet from my truck, holding on to a heavy compressor, trying hard to stay still and not put the darn thing down because I didn't want to startle the deer.

I was about to topple over with the effort when the homeowner came out of the house. To my surprise the deer didn't run off; they just sort of circle back to the edge of the woods and I could see them peering from the shadows. The homeowner was an older lady and she smiled at me as she started her evening walk.

"They are pretty, aren't they?" she asked.

"Yes, and not frightened of humans at all," I said, as I heaved my compressor over the side of the truck. "I thought they would scamper off at the sight of me."

"They're shy, but they know they're safe here. Their mother was killed by a car when they were babies and somehow they managed to wander back here in between me and my neighbor. We were very worried about them because there was no mommy to take care of them."

Awww. So sad. I looked at the shadows, imagining two frightened Bambis that terrible night when they lost their mother.

"They appear in good health," I remarked. "And they're big now."

"Oh yes, they're much bigger. Earlier this year, they were tiny and you could see them curled up next to each other in the evening. One would sleep, its head resting against its sibling's, while the other kept watch. They took turns like that all night. The other neighbor asked around how to feed them and they ate from the feeder, thank goodness. They're fine now, but we still worry at night."

And now I worry at night too.

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Post #2: A Facial Story

I found this video morphing all of Priscilla Presley's photos from baby age to now fascinating. The way the certain facial movements stayed the same through the decades intrigued me. Also, I was amazed how the talented creator of this piece somehow made the face morphed while it was turning in the other direction. It tells a story, doesn't it? What would you title it?

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