Posts
I enjoyed the following joke precisely because it is exactly HOW logical IRS forms are:
The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and will tell you whether you are qualified to be a professional. The questions are NOT that difficult.
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.
(IRS Instructions: See the box in the middle of nowhere? Put this amount in this box, of course)
(Me: Putting that number in the box in the middle of nowhere)
(IRS Next Instruction: Now, put this number on another form and attach it with this other form. Why? Because this form will support that form)
(Me: Oh.)
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.
(IRS LOGIC: You may ignore Page A. Go to page B. Put all the other numbers there)
(Me: What other numbers?)
(IRS red flag: The ones from the previous page)
(Me: But you told me to ignore Page A!)
(IRS: Silence)
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.
(IRS: You can use these deductions, but only if it's 2 percent of net, no, gross, no, net, no, gross income)
(Me: But last year you said I can you these Other Deductions)
(IRS logic: We don't remember last year's rules)
Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
(IRS: Sorry, you're out of money again. We have apartyMEETING to go to now because you actually worked! Better luck next year)
Bear with me while I learn. The first button likes the POST. The second button likes the BLOG site. Please help me by "liking" me. Thanks!
5 comments:
This is why I always pay an accountant to do my taxes.
The IRS is not the only one to speak that strange language. Have you ever read a job posting on USA jobs? Try and understand the requirements and duties on one of them suckers.
How do you fit 5 elephants into a VW bettle? 2 in the fron seat and 3 in the back. How do you fit a giraffe into same VW beetle? Put it in the trunk. Those are jokes my dad makes year after year. I'll send him your questions so he can have new material.
Lol when my friends sent me the questions before, I failed every single one. They really are simple. My 4-year-old niece got them and I didn't.
But I love your IRS instructions. I wouldn't know how your forms work, but ours are pretty straightforward.
Love it! Good thing I wasn't trying to drink when reading that.
I think you need to send bad puppie over to deal with those IRS peeps.
Post a Comment