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VIRTUALLY HERS came out Oct. 2009. Get it at SAMHAIN Publishing. VIRTUALLY ONE coming soon.
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VIRTUALLY HERS UPDATE

VIRTUALLY HERS OUT IN PRINT AUG 2010! Discounted at Amazon!

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Friday, November 16, 2007

Heh! Heh! Heh! Merry Christmas!

Don't forget to enter your name for a chance to get Shiloh Walker's book! Just comment on yesterday's blog.

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When you see a fat guy with a white beard and wearing a red suit in a department store in December, say, around Christmas, and he turns to you with a twinkle in his eye and booms out, "HO! HO! HO!", would you really, REALLY, feel insulted and think he's calling you a whore?

I mean, is that really politically incorrect?

Apparently so, according to a department store in Australia. They had instructed their Santa trainees to say "Ha! Ha! Ha!" instead because "ho" is derogatory. Of course, news travel quickly around the internet and news-world, and there was some laughter and ridicule. The store has since backpedaled and issued an email saying that this wasn't why they started this policy, that "HO! HO! HO!" was frightening the children and they were just protecting the kids.

Do you buy that? If you do, I have a couple of heh! heh! heh! I wanna sell you.

And if you think I'm getting paranoid that people are forgetting what Christmas is about, Lowe's has started calling their Christmas trees "family trees" in their catalogues. Apparently, they didn't want to offend their non-Christian customers. Apparently, it's okay to offend their Christian ones.

What if you don't have a family and still want a tree? Is Lowe's insulting us non-family Christmas celebrants, huh?

So, if I see a fat guy in a red suit coming down the chimney booming "Ho! Ho! Ho!", he'd better bring a lot of goodies for that insult. ;-) And chocolates. Good truffles. I'm easy that way.

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I can't believe that it's time to think about Christmas already. Do you feel worn out? I feel very tired this year and will be glad to get 2007 over with, to be honest. But then, next year will be:

RUNNING OF THE BULLS YEAR.

Aiiiiiiii....

Yes, it's time for a Ranger Buddy Running Of The Bulls Update. Ranger Buddy tried running around a building the other night and 30 years of laying shingles have all but destroyed the cartilage in his knees. Thus, can I just be kind and say he was very. slow.? LOL.

In fact, he said it best when he described it to someone: "I was so pathetic, my only hope of not being gored is the bulls stopping to laugh at me."

So now the grand plan is to buy a mini trampoline (the really small round kind) and run on it to strengthen the muscles around the kneecaps. I'll update, of course, as soon as I get a pic of him landing on his ass when he springs too high. You know he's going to. There's no doubt in my mind.

One good thing, though. His trip to Spain is respurring him to practice his Spanish during lunch. At night he's studying for his nursing school stuff. Then there is the gym. And the ballroom dancing.

That man is a ho for pain, I tell ya.



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7 comments:

Athena said...

well that's ridiculous. I guess saying FUCK FUCK FUCK would be much too offensive? Well, anyways I hate to disallusion you but Beowulf gerr-bear's movie is in fact sold in the us...LOL...have you tried target? That's where i bought mine. May I just say that it wanted me to shout Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!? only in a ho-ish way of course. ;)

Leilani said...

I don't feel offended by Ho, Ho, Ho. But his politically correctness is going too far. First the Cookie Monster has to give up cookies and start eating veggies, THEN, they go and rename GI Joe's which is now going to be an acronym for "Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity". Grrrrr.

Elaine said...

Instead of Ha! Ha! Ha!, Ho! Ho! Ho! or Heh! Heh! Heh!, maybe they could say He! He! He!

But then the feminists might insist on She! She! She! and we'd all compromise and end up with It! It! It!

Gennita said...

Athena,
I'll try to remember to get Beowulf at Target then. I'm terrible at watching movies on DVD unless someone does it with me. But for Gerry...yeah, okay!

I think I'd be shocked if a Santa comes up to me and yell F F F to me!

Leilani,
WHAT? Global what? Arrghhhh. That sounds even more stupid than Ha Ha Ha!

Elaine,
You have a point there. It! It! It! backatcha. Sometimes corporations are damn silly, aren't they?

iris said...

Wow, I wish I had RB's energy. Does he ever sleep?

LadyZannah said...

I love GI Joe, being PC sucks and HO!HO!HO! and Bah Humbug to all!

Gennita said...

Iris,
He told me that the older he gets, the less sleep he needs. I believe him. Have you ever been to the gym at 5am? In Florida, I mean. Average age: 66 years old.

We YOUNG 'UNs like to work out in the evening and at night! ;-)

Lady Zannah,
Don't let the PC police hear you!!!

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