Uber Alpha Seizes The Iron Horse

Have you ever seen the movie, TROY, with Brad Pitt in glorious wallpaper-form? Here is a great parody script:

TROY IN FIFTEEN MINUTES

Snark at its best ;-). I laughed like a maniac while eating the very last (thank God) of the turkey leftovers. I can so see Achilles screaming, "I CUT YOU!" while spearing a man, like, three miles away. LOL.

Tomorrow, the Alpha Male is taking his very first motorcycle riding lesson. It's sort of like a parody of Troy--a bunch of males circling around a parking lot menacingly, trying to be baaaaaad bikers. At 15 mph. Vroom Vroom Vroom! Trying not to hit the orange cones. This is going to be sooooo popcorn good to watch. I think I'll sneak a drive by with the radio playing very loudly, Leader of the Pack. Think it'd get me chased by a very clumsy, slow-moving, falling-over biker gang? Hahahahahahahaha.

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Still Wallpapering

It's Thursday. Really, that turkey stuff is still traveling through my system. On the other hand, the wallpaper is looking great! If only I can find one of a sexay guy holding a sexay vege. ;-) Then I can send it to SQ for Christmas.

You know, it struck me yesterday that I now have diverse enough readers of this blog to ask the ultimate question: what is your occupation? It's always good to see the varied backgrounds of romance readers, so please take a few secs. and comment in today's post. Let me know what you do in real life and in dream life (we all know that really, we are top secret vampire slayer ex-CIA agents who meets with a dangerous and handsome alpha client, heh). I really wanna know.

Besides, I'm wallpapering! Come on, entertain me. ::sob::

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Still Taking A Break

I wish wallpapering in life is as interesting and easy as puter wallpapering ;-). My favorite twins look so good in this pic, don't they?

I was looking at the New York Times 100 Most Notable Books in 2007 (can't link--you have to be a member). One hundred titles later, and there's only one that I might read: Harry Potter #7. That makes me...so unkewl ;-). Are any of you members of the NYT online (free)? If you are, let me know whether you've read anything else on that list.

Bad Puppy has decided that the tall laundry basket is his new "nest." He loves to jump in and play in there...until he's bored. Then he finds out he's trapped because it's not the same jumping out as jumping in.... Hahaha, found a new puppy prison. The whines are pathetic.

Book recommendation: You have to read C. L. Wilson's Lord of The Fading Lands. Now. So damn good.

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Quick Post #2: Uber Male Pic

Someone sent me this gorgeous wallpaper and I just have to share ;-).

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Exhaustion Is Not A Good Way To Live

Unless something amazing happens (like the appearance of an email from my webmistress that she's done with CERTAIN FILES), I'm taking a few days off, although I'll be here answering the Shoutbox and maybe posting replies. The last week--relatives, friends, cooking, birthdays, entertainment, and working on the roof everyday--have pushed me to my limit and my state of zombiehood has not improved with alcoholic fortification.

Don't let me stop you from telling me about your reading and entertainment ;-). I've been totally enchanted by C.L. Wilson's Lord of The Fading Lands as well as the second book just out, Lady of Light and Shadows. There is so much to love and to talk about in these books. However, I'm reading the LoLaS backwards because...well, because...so I'm not quite done yet as I fill in the gaps between end of the first book and the second. Yes, yes, I'm weird like dat.

So, please entertain me with a funny thing your relative did during Thanksgiving. Oh, you know how weird family gatherings are during get-togethers! Have you seen some of the YouTube Turkey Day shenanigans the men have been up to? Dude. Line male turkey dancing is NOT pretty. My brain. It hurts.

Or, if you're from outside the States, you can tell me why you lub His Jedness or ____ so much. I'm not picky. ;-)

"Here we are now
Entertain us
I feel stupid
and contagious...."

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Uber Dance Troupe

I love all things "old Eastern Europe." I don't know why, but I've always been drawn to them--the history surrounding Georgia, Azerbaijan, Ukraine, even Turkey. The mix of cultures in that part of the world--ancient Moorish, mountain tribal, half-Western half-Eastern, familiar sounds/music/words that aren't familiar at all--fascinates and captivates me. That's where my characters, Shahrukh Kingsley and a few others, come from; they provide an outlet for me to explore that part of the world, especially Turkey (some day, some day, sigh....).

Last night I went to see the Georgian National Ballet, SUKHISVILI. If they come to your area, try to catch it. They are just beautiful to watch, and not your grandmama's ballerinas.

It's very male-oriented, with action that rivals kungfu-movies without CGI ;-). The males perform stunts with real swords as they dance (a war folkdance). They are also probably the only male ballet dancers required to dance on pointe without the help of the traditional sliver of wood in the shoes.

This video captures the essense and excitement of what I saw last night. If some of the dancing seems sped up, it isn't. Their feet and jumps were really that fierce and fast. It was amazing to watch!



Wow, huh?

The costumes were just out of this world. The dancing and music itself reminded me of Susan Johnson's older Russian historicals (fierce mountain warlord and princes fighting at the borders), Chinese and Indian delicate hand moves, African tribal dancing, and oddly, Irish quick clogging. I was just mesmerized by the quick and powerful males contrasted by the very strange, ethereal, gliding movements of the female dancers. I was also reminded of MY GERRY BUTLER TV movie, Attila the Hun, which showed mountain warriors in similar costumes (especially during the wedding at the end).

I hope you get to see this show! I had really good seats and fell in love with a few of these marvelous young men ;-).

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Uber Paranoia

Okay, maybe it's the turkey-induced state of mind, but I was amused and somewhat non-plussed by this holiday message on Patricia Cornwell's website:

A Message from Patricia Cornwell

We have reason to suspect that someone (or a group of someones) might be mobilizing people to attack me through Amazon and Barnes and Noble, etc., to hurt my sales and reputation.

So here is what I'm asking. Would you please encourage your friends and those you have contact with that if they like Book of the Dead, to please spread the word, and if so inclined, to please post their reviews on Amazon or Barnes and Noble. It's easy to do. For Amazon.com, if you already have an account, you can post a review. Otherwise, open an account by buying a book. You can also check the boxes of other reviews to say you disagree or did not find their review helpful, if this is so. Barnes and Noble does not appear to require any account for posting reviews.

Over the past week there were about fifty bad reviews posted for a book that has gotten the highest reviews for any book I have ever written. If you see what I am saying. Interstingly, this all started right after a Pentagon high official tried to get me to make a pro Bush, pro war appearance on an aircraft carrier and I refused, politely, a photo opportunity to contradict what is in my novel! Not to mention my battle over Ruth Graham's burial. Suddenly, I am getting a barage of reviews discouraging people from buying my book, though there are some good ones as of today because my supporters are chiming in.

Right now I need my supporters. I am not asking you to write anything you do not mean. But why should hateful people be the only ones heard?
You and your friends can help by reading the book, encouraging others to read it, and posting their feelings about it - honest feelings.

With appreciation, Patricia

Ooookay.

After a couple of glasses of an excellent mixed drink called Pink Velvet Fetish (it is soooo gooood), I couldn't resist the following holiday announcement myself:

A THANKSGIVING MESSAGE FROM GENNITA

Dear fans,

The President thinks I know about his remoteviewing talents. His minions, the CIA, suspect I have the secret ingredients to the Serum. They are angry because I’m revealing it all in my book, Virtually His.

That’s why there are these 1-star reviews on Amazon.com — to detract people from the truth, the secret, the answer. (Virtually His, Virtually His, Virtually His…)

You have to go now to Amazon and Barnes and Noble and write several five-star reviews of my newest book. That will show the President that the good people of the United States are behind me!!!!! (Virtually His, Virtually His, Virtually His)

Sincerely,
Gennita

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Uber Gobble Day!

I know, I know :::hanging head:::. You're busy cooking and dealing with relatives. I'm here playing with my blog colors. Life's unfair, isn't it? ;-)

Look at it this way. In half an hour, I'll be on the roof to work till 2pm. Then I have to rush home to get ready to feast with friends. So, there, feel much better now?

Yes, the blog colors look sucky. I was tired of the green. I thought blue was better than pink. You baste turkeys; I paste pictures of turkeys. It's all work!

Happy Thanksgiving!

I'm always, always, thankful for my wonderful readers and friends, who are both generous withm and definitely, tolerant of, my sexy veges.

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What's Cooking?

Wahhh, are you girls ignoring me for FAMILY and TURKEY? ;-) Well, no sexy sweet potato story for you then, hmmmph.

Instead, you get to read a wonderful article about the growth of romance on PUBLISHERS WEEKLY, titled Texually Promiscuous. It's about how the sub-genres of romance combine all the different layers that we readers love: adventure, fantasy, sex, and romantic elements. There is nothing like a romance ;-).

Beth Anne, the bookseller mentioned here, is a really fantastic reader/bookseller in Colorado Springs. If you live near that area, do pay a visit to her store. It's filled with signed items by very, very big and famous authors including Brockmann and Nora Roberts. She bakes the most fabulous cookies for her signings. I always try to drop by for a visit when I'm in the Denver, CO. area.

So, you go back to your turkeys and I'll go back to mine (on the roof). To my American readers, Happy Thanksgiving and drive safely. To those who outside the States, well, why aren't you posting here?!

(I've just started C.L. Wilson's Lord of The Fading Lands)

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Stream-of-Consciousness Ode To Turkeys

I know I have many readers outside the States who don't celebrate Thanksgiving and probably don't even understand the meaning of turkey and sweet potatoes. Don't worry, neither do I. I just participate because everyone does ;-).

The turkey, I was told, was this close to being our National Bird. It really does have some great qualities. For example, the turkey has excellent vision and hearing. Their field of vision is about 270 degrees, which is as close to having eyes at the back of one's head as one could get. It can run up to 20mph and take flight at great bursts of speed up to 55 mph. Benjamin Franklin, one of our forefathers, was the one who wanted the turkey to be our National Bird, but he was an eccentric genius who flew kites during storms, so yeah, you know there were a lot of eye-rolling and coughing among the other esteemed forefather dudes when old B.F. suggested the turkey!

So, we ended up with the majestic eagle. I have to admit the eagle brings more fear and a sense of pride in me than the gobbling turkey. Would you name your football team the Florida Gobbling Turkeys? Or would you prefer the Florida Eagles? Thought so.

So, we save the eagle. And we eat the darn turkeys, 'kay?

Do we romance the turkeys like we romance the eagle? Think of it...we wouldn't mind a hero who's a were-eagle, right? We embrace that. Do you think Anita Blake would use her magic hooha with a were-turkey? Okay, strike that thought. ;-) Anita would do it with a were-worm, if it meant a possibility of a threesome in the future. LOL.

But back to the turkeys and Thanksgiving. My question from over twenty-some years ago remained unanswered. I asked, when I was told that the first Thanksgiving feast didn't include turkeys but probably deer, why was the turkey suddenly picked as the bird/food of choice then? Today, two decades later, I still haven't gotten an answer. I suppose, one day a bunch of hunters couldn't find a darn deer all freaking week before Thanksgiving, and there was this bunch of wild turkeys just sitting there, gobbling away, and they just shot them and brought them home to their wives.

"That's the Thanksgiving turkey, honey," said the hunter to his wife. And who was she to complain? It's definitely easier than carving, gutting and skinning a deer. Turkey it was! And there you have it--a tradition started ;-).

Incidentally, we've gotten to using "turkey" as a synonym for "dummy." So, really, a were-turkey would be a really stupid hero, I think. With wrinkly excess neck skin. Oh ugh.

Not that we readers are that literal with our imaginations, of course. I mean, it is the BALD eagle, you know. ;-)

But back to the turkey. If there were such a thing as a were-turkey, one of my workers would be it. He talks and talks and talks ALL day, so much so that after a while, the words sound suspiciously like "gobblegobblegobbleygook." And he is a bit dumb. Okay, a lot dumb.

For example, he was telling us today that he was a Thanksgiving baby and that he'd be 46 on Thursday. And proceeded to tell us about the birthday feast, the turkey, the stuffing, everything that he planned to do. Then he let slipped that he was born in 1962.

A pause in our hammering.

"Uh. Yo, dude. That makes you 45 this Thursday."

"No, it doesn't. I've been 45 all year."

"If you were born in 62, and your birthday is this Thursday, you're turning 45, dude."

"I tell you, I am 45 already."

"No, you aren't."

"Am too!"

"Do the math."

He waved his fingers dramatically. "72. 82. 92. 02. That's 40. 03, 04, 05, 0...6, 0.............se....ven. Forty.....five," he counted, the last few numbers coming out rather reluctantly.

"See? I was right. You're actually 44. Not that it fucking matters since you've been 45 all year."

His birdcrown creased. The neck skin looked suspiciously red. "Huh?" Angry sniff. Rotating 270 degrees-eyes "Dammit. My wife tricked me! She told me I was 45! Can you believe it, she got my age wrong!"

Multiple groans and snickers around the roof. And that, my friends, is not an alpha were-turkey either.

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My Personal Uber Sweet Potato

WINNER OF SHILOH WALKER'S HUNTING THE HUNTER IS SQ, the Yankees' Handmaiden. Please email me, sweets! You win some monkey nuts too ;-).

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What is wrong with these people (whoever these people are...)?! They didn't put my Gerry Butler in the Top 10 of the People's Sexiest Man?! Not even Top 15?! Are they nuts?!!!!!!!

He made the Top 100. Sniff. ::::grumble, grumble::::

Here is his pretty face and quote:

Gerard on People's Top 100 Sexiest Men

Have they not look closely at that face? Those abs in 300? Gotten mesmerized by that accent? My Gerry should have placed in the top 10 this year ;-).

They did put Patrick Dempsey at #2. Do you know who beat them all? Matt Damon. Here's the complete LIST and PICS.

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I found an Asian sweet potato ball recipe that sounds do-able for experts like me:

Ingredients:

1 lb of sweet potatoes
12 tablespoons of all-purpose flour
3 1/2 tablespoons of sugar
3 tablespoons of sesame seeds
Water
Oil for deep frying

Boil the sweet potatoes for 15 minutes. Peel the skin of the sweet potatoes and discard. Smash the sweet potatoes and combine them with flour, sugar, and just enough water to form a smooth dough that is soft in texture but not sticky.

Divide dough into small, equal portions and roll them into balls. Coat the balls with some sesame seeds. Deep fry the sweet potato balls till golden brown. Dish out and drain well before serving.

There, I think I can satisfy my sweet potato craving with this. Tomorrow...sexy sweet potato pictures!

************

The Kirkland Files are done, but the server is acting wonky and we needed to double check everything to make sure the pictures come out right. Be patient. You'll love them when we unveil the lovely COS Commandos for your Thanksgiving feast ;-).

************
Tomorrow, if I remember, I'll tell about Ranger Buddy's Sweet Potato story. It's 30 years old and it's still quite...umm...interesting.

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Saturday Potatoes Aren't Normal

Today, for some reason, my memory reminded me that the deadline for the annual RWA RITA contest is at the end of this month. For the first time in my writing career, I'm actually hesitating about entering my book!

For one thing, they change the categories' descriptions again, and I'm not even sure whether I really fit in romantic suspense. For another, I have had readers and reviewers confusing Virtually His as a paranormal/scifi type story, so should I enter it in that category? And if I do, would I be marked down because, heck, it's not actually paranormal? LOL. Third, well...third is just knowing that I probably won't win, and maybe I should just save the entry fee and cost of mailing books to buy myself a nice dress for the RITA awards ceremony instead.

Ah well. What to do, what to do....

BTW, next year's RWA is going to be in San Francisco, girls and boys! If you live nearby, mark your calendars now and try to make it to the Literacy Signing, where you can meet a few hundred of your favorite authors signing their books. All proceeds from the sales go to promote literacy, so it's for a good cause.

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Girl talk:

I was looking for some sweet potatoes/yam recipes, other than the usual casserole, thinking of trying one out for Thanksgiving. Do you know that yam is NOT a sweet potato, but to add to the confusion, canned sweet potatoes in the stores are sometimes labeled as yams? So, when I claim that I love the very sexy yam ;-), does that mean I actually love the sweet potato?!

Anyway, I was HOPING to surprise my girlfriend with some Malaysian sweet potato balls, but maybe I meant yam balls? I'm confusing myself. I should just stick to being a sullen writer, hapless and helpless in all household affairs.

Guy talk:

Well, not your typical guy talk, since it's with the one roofer who is the master of linguistics.

Him: "You wouldn't believe it! She was supposed to be taking care of my kid, and when I rang the doorbell, she was naked!"

RB: "Why was she naked?"

Him: (pause) "Because she wasn't wearing any clothes."

All of us: (sigh)

Maybe I do write para-normals! Ha.

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Heh! Heh! Heh! Merry Christmas!

Don't forget to enter your name for a chance to get Shiloh Walker's book! Just comment on yesterday's blog.

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When you see a fat guy with a white beard and wearing a red suit in a department store in December, say, around Christmas, and he turns to you with a twinkle in his eye and booms out, "HO! HO! HO!", would you really, REALLY, feel insulted and think he's calling you a whore?

I mean, is that really politically incorrect?

Apparently so, according to a department store in Australia. They had instructed their Santa trainees to say "Ha! Ha! Ha!" instead because "ho" is derogatory. Of course, news travel quickly around the internet and news-world, and there was some laughter and ridicule. The store has since backpedaled and issued an email saying that this wasn't why they started this policy, that "HO! HO! HO!" was frightening the children and they were just protecting the kids.

Do you buy that? If you do, I have a couple of heh! heh! heh! I wanna sell you.

And if you think I'm getting paranoid that people are forgetting what Christmas is about, Lowe's has started calling their Christmas trees "family trees" in their catalogues. Apparently, they didn't want to offend their non-Christian customers. Apparently, it's okay to offend their Christian ones.

What if you don't have a family and still want a tree? Is Lowe's insulting us non-family Christmas celebrants, huh?

So, if I see a fat guy in a red suit coming down the chimney booming "Ho! Ho! Ho!", he'd better bring a lot of goodies for that insult. ;-) And chocolates. Good truffles. I'm easy that way.

*******************

I can't believe that it's time to think about Christmas already. Do you feel worn out? I feel very tired this year and will be glad to get 2007 over with, to be honest. But then, next year will be:

RUNNING OF THE BULLS YEAR.

Aiiiiiiii....

Yes, it's time for a Ranger Buddy Running Of The Bulls Update. Ranger Buddy tried running around a building the other night and 30 years of laying shingles have all but destroyed the cartilage in his knees. Thus, can I just be kind and say he was very. slow.? LOL.

In fact, he said it best when he described it to someone: "I was so pathetic, my only hope of not being gored is the bulls stopping to laugh at me."

So now the grand plan is to buy a mini trampoline (the really small round kind) and run on it to strengthen the muscles around the kneecaps. I'll update, of course, as soon as I get a pic of him landing on his ass when he springs too high. You know he's going to. There's no doubt in my mind.

One good thing, though. His trip to Spain is respurring him to practice his Spanish during lunch. At night he's studying for his nursing school stuff. Then there is the gym. And the ballroom dancing.

That man is a ho for pain, I tell ya.

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Want A Book or Monkey Nuts for Thanksgiving?

Awesome Shiloh Walker is offering my book, Virtually His, in her Book of the Month contest at her blog. It's still open to those who are interested till end of November.

I thought I would also offer one of Shiloh's books to introduce her to some of you who've never read her. She has so many releases in paperback and e-books that it's hard to catch up with her! ;-) Anyway, for those who love futuristics/urban fantasy and want to read HUNTING THE HUNTER, just comment in today's blog for the rest of the week.

Here's the book description from Amazon:

Bounty hunter Kane Winter has spent two years looking for the mysterious woman who was there when his partner was killed. But when the hunted turns out to be a seductive vampire, Kane is consumed by a desire greater than vengeance-a hunger to possess this woman for himself.

Sounds good, doesn't it?

***********************************************

It's Thanksgiving next week and I'm tempted to tempt my fate with Delta and visit family in Ohio. You know me and Atlanta airport--we have a history ;-). Sometimes it's sad to live in a podunk town with only two airlines in the International Airport. Also, Jiggle Low doesn't like it when mommy is out of town. That possessive bad puppy does mean panty raids when I'm away for a few days. Yup...nice Victoria Secret panties lost forever to puppy teething frenzy.

Do you intend to cook a turkey and entertain (NOT YOU, SQ!!!) or are you planning to visit and be entertained?

When I stay in town, I usually spend Thanksgiving with a close friend and her family. She's a marvelous cook and her sweet potato dish is to die for. For my part, I offer fried rice. Yup. Every year, I make that family Gennita's Fly Lice for Thanksgiving and Christmas, so much so that her son, who turned seventeen this year, thought EVERY family had fried rice for those occasions until he spent Thanksgiving at his girlfriend's place one year.

He told me they looked shocked when he asked, "Where's the fly lice?" Bwahahaha. I've destroyed his and his siblings' adulthood expectations forever. I still remember fondly when I gave them "monkey nuts" for Halloween one year as a "Trick." I call the Ichiban sour limes "monkey nuts," for you Asian girls who know these things ;-). I had, in my mean bad youth, chased away many eager Jehovah Witnesses who came calling at my house with "monkey nuts" offerings. I don't do that any more, of course. Really!

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Uber Bad Boy's Bird Day

Guess whose birthday it was yesterday?

Yesssss...it's my Gerry's birthday ;-). And of course, there's nothing like a Gerry Birthday Video:



Sigh. The man is perfect at 38.

And his Beowulf and Grendel movie, filmed in Iceland, isn't available on screen in the States. Wahhhh. So here is the trailer:



I love Gerry best when he's intense and warrior-like ;-). Have any of you living outside the States been able to catch this movie? How was it?

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Bike and Book Ride

Last night, I secretly met with my biker buddy Moosetail. He brought over a battery kit to recharge the bike in my garage, as well as showed me a thing or two about the clutch, the brakes, etc., you know, stuff that the OWNER should know.

Moosetail invited me out for a ride on his bike and so I grabbed my leather jacket and glasses (I am a seasoned biker passenger), tied my hair back, and hopped on. Woohoo! Riding a bike with a pro is definitely a thumbs-up! For one thing, no pushing the bike, heh!

We zipped out to the main road towards the beachside and while making the turn, I...uh...noticed Alpha Male's truck going by the other way. You know, I should buy a sekret bike, stash it somewhere and learn how to ride the thing. Then, when he finally graduates from his stupid sekret bike class, I can show up in my Suzuki or whatever and steal his thunder ;-).

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I finished reading Toni Andrews' Beg For Mercy. It's a good first book...no vampires, werewolves, or "magick," and even though it's called an urban fantasy by many, it read more like an everyday normal contemporary with a heroine who has the power to hypnotize those around her to do her bidding. It's not even dark in tone.

Mercy is just a sassy loner who sort of fears her power because she knows she can inadvertently hurt someone. For example, when she was a kid and was being bullied, she shouted, "Why don't you take a jump?" or something like that, and of course, said bully did, into ongoing traffic, which Mercy hadn't planned on.

Anyway, it's a light and quick read for me. If you're tired of the angsty vampire/slayer/ werewolf/witch and demon paranormals out there, give this new author a try. There are some too-easy plot contrivances and the usual kookie friend-turned-psychic sidekick. I must admit the first person didn't work as well for me as in other urban fantasy books, but mostly, I think, because I didn't believe this book to be one. Am I making sense here? Probably not. But for some reason, I can read urban fantasy/gothic fantasy in first person POV, but not contemporary (even with a heroine with a mental gift).

Throughout the book, because the heroine is the only person who knows about her ability among her friends, she is also the only one running around doing the investigative stuff. Her friends and her new lover/boyfriend act as props who get in her way or help her in arranging meetings with people who could give her the information she needs. Very convenient and coincidental, in some ways. At one point, she even manages to "press" (as she called it) a snarling and fierce enemy's dog who was guarding her girlfriend to become a doting pet just with one command. That was too easy and a bit much.

I'm interested to see whether the writing will turn darker now that Mercy, at the end of the book, has broken every rule she has set out not to do when using her gift. The romantic conflict should be interesting, since the boyfriend knows something is up and is angry/concerned/bewildered that he's kept in the dark. It's a new relationship, so he doesn't want to commit to someone with secrets.

Mercy, of course, has a HUGE secret. And at the end of the book, she finds out that her parents might not be normal. Which means she isn't normal herself.

I'd love to hear your thoughts if you decide to read this book. It's always fun to see what readers think of the beginning of a new continuing series. Setting one up is very hard (I should know, sigh) because not only must the writer introduce the elements that make up the storyverse, but she/he must find a spot to end it and bring the readers to the second book. Sometimes that can get controversial (heh, I should know this too, doublesigh).

In Beg For Mercy, the young heroine finds out that her secret power is bigger than what she'd thought it to be. The series ends with it as a set-up for her to look for her parents and her heritage (really that is the only urban fantasy element that I found). I'm not sure, however, whether I want to read book after book where the main action is the heroine asking questions and the characters dutifully answering them in a monotone of sorts.

Definitely, the scene I'm looking forward to is when the boyfriend finds out about her powers and starts to question whether everything he's ever shared with her has been manipulated by her power. Now that could be dark and powerful. Being that this set-up book is more snarky/fun/light, that scene I'm imagining is probably all in my head ;-).

But you want dark and powerful? That's when the Alpha Male starts up that bike again this week. Hahahahahaha.

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Uber Crazy Challenge Must Be Ignored

So Shit and Grits is abuzzed with news that Ranger Buddy is going to run with the bulls. Everyone is grilling me about it, like I'd know why????! But I do know that he's serious...he'd bought tickets and booked some kind of five-star hotel stay in Portugal that costs a million dollars a night, or something like that. Then, afterwards, Spain.

Anyway, RB has been issueing some kind of coded challenge to me. Take the following video as a parody of a conversation he and I had. I'm the gentleman on the left and he's the one on the right. Substitute certain words in the dialogue: When the gent on the right offers the gent on the left a yacht, a mansion, etc...replace with a motorcycle, a whole room with books, a thousand dollars' worth of Ichiban products. The mangoes, however, stay ;-).




I'm not kidding, the above conversation was remarkably similar in tone to the one I had. Yes, I did tell Ranger Buddy that I viewed running with the bulls equivalent to certain death. RB thought about it a moment and said, with equal seriousness, "How about putting your head in a lion's mouth?"

I do think he has gone mad....And I'm amused that he thinks I'm crazy enough to join him. Yeah, skydiving. Yeah, hanging upside down from a three-storey building with him holding to my foot. Yeah, walking into a biker bar in the middle of redneck territory. But running with the bulls? Nope. No, no, no, no, no. Being chased by 3000lb bulls up a narrow cobblestone street with a few hundred other drunken idiots is not my idea of adrenaline fun.

***********

Also, I saw Moonlight, the new vampire TV show, for the first time last night. Interesting, but not quite sure whether I will be watching it weekly. Cool to see a vampire that's only sixty years old and not hundreds, AND from 1950s USA and not 1700s Ireland/France/exotic island. The two male vampires' quick and dry repartee was sort of like the Supernatural brothers, wasn't it?

However, I'm getting tired of the now-fashionable protagonist voiceover, giving a beginning, or a comment, or an ending thought. It's called LAZY WRITING, folks. I first noticed it in Desperate Housewives, with the voiceover of a dead person. It was unique then, and gave a sense of mystery to the episodes. Then it's in a dozen other shows--Men In Trees, Pushing Up Daisies, Grey's Anatomy--somebody's internal monologue, telling, telling, telling, substituting dialogue with emo-looks from the characters as mood music tricks the audience. Lazy, lazy, lazy.

Okay, didn't mean to rant today. Back to Moonlight, the newest vampire TV show. He's no Angel, for sure. The angst and the anger? Not edgy enough. And the comic timing with deadpan delivery? Nope, he's no Boreanez ;-). But the show's storyline has potential. Any of you caught it on the tube yet?

P/S. In the video above, that's Tim Kang, the guy from the Cingular commercials.

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Uber Divas

That, in the background, is my George Clooney flipping a bird at Fabio. Two romance gods had a catfight a few nights ago at a restaurant. Fabio was having dinner with some ladies and they started snapping photographs. George, sitting with his lady nearby, thought they were taking photos of him and he asked them to stop.

Fabio told him it was all about him, that he was the real buttah. George said, nonononono, it was ALL ABOUT HIM, that he was the real buttah. Fabio then yelled, "Oh, stop being a diva!"

At which, George, having had a couple of drinks, stood up and pushed Fabio! Fabio pushed back! Words! Insults hurled! Hair tossing! Manboobs bumping! And then the waiters intervened.

Damn. What I wouldn't give to see my George and Fabio clawing each other's eyes out. All romance gods are divas, don't they know? Thank God Fabio didn't hurt my baby's beautiful chin dimple.

;-)

Definitely not uberspy material, eh?

***********

I keep forgetting, but here's Publishers' Weekly list of the BEST 2007 Books. Their romance list is very small:

Romance

Twice the Temptation by Suzanne Enoch (Avon)

This double feature concerns one couple in 1814, one couple in 2007 (Enoch's popular Billionaire series leads) and the cursed diamond they're all mixed up with; crisp dialogue, smart characters and brisk plotting throughout.

The Perfect Bride by Brenda Joyce (HQN)

Joyce's seventh de Warenne novel is a first-rate Regency with deliciously damaged leads; fluff-free, Joyce's tight plot and vivid cast make for a romance that's just about perfect.

Wired by Liz Maverick (Dorchester/Shomi)

Told by a sassy female computer programmer pursued by two strange men with the power to alter reality, this suprising mashup of romance and cyberpunk may be the blueprint for romance's next generation.

One with the Shadows by Susan Squires (St. Martin's)

With a mischievous leading lady and a mannered but offbeat vampire mythos, this 1820s paranormal is so solid and subtle, it may convert devotees of traditional historicals.

The Winter Lodge by Susan Wiggs (Mira)

Complicated, flesh-and-blood characters inhabit Wiggs's idyllic but identifiable Lakeshore Chronicles, weaving a refreshingly honest smalltown tapestry of romance, domestic drama, mystery and generations-old Polish recipes.

They are missing some other great books! What about Marjorie Liu's Soul Song? And Emma Holly's Fairyville, something different from her? I bet y'all can add a few to that list, can't you?

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Uber Alpha Says: It Goes Vroom Vroom

Okay, I have the nice shiny new toy in my garage. Sigh. Why do I get the feeling I'll be learning to ride that thing too?

Here's how you can tell the man doesn't know a thing about motorcycles. When news got out that he now owns one, and when he was asked, "What kind of bike did you buy?", the Alpha man replied, in steely seriousness, "Black."

Bwahahahahahahahaha.

Book I've just started: Toni Andrews' BEG FOR MERCY, a new paranormal series. Very fun read so far, but written in first POV like an urban fantasy. It's not an urban fantasy, though, as far as I can tell. It's also not violent at all, at least not yet, so it's a nice change from the intense action of, let's say, the Danny Valentine series. Will tell more when I'm done.

What book is in your hot little hands right now? Tell me!

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Uber Alpha Men Just Can't

I love me my Alphas. I really do. And they are my source of humor.

Trust me, they are a funny, funny species.

A certain Alpha man wants to buy a motorcycle. He has never ridden one before, never been interested, really, but for some reason, he has decided that now is the right time to ride the roaring beast.

One day, he sees a used motorcycle for sale for the right price. He contacts the seller and makes an appointment to look at it.

Does he bring a male buddy who knows about bikes? You think? ;-)

He brings ME. Gennita, who knows nothing, NOTHING (other than riding and hanging decorously on), about bikes. To show off his new toy, you say? Oh, not so, my dears.

When you're with an Alpha, you know they don't just show off toys like that. Oh, there's a reason why an Alpha man would take me to buy a motorcycle and it ain't to show off.

I know exactly why I've been asked to go along to check out the beast. For one tiny, itsy-bitty, moment, I consider not playing my part. Torture comes in many forms, you know ;-). But ah, well. I'm, after all, a nice, friendly woman who understands the innate shyness of an Alpha man TO ASK FOR DIRECTIONS.

So I dutifully open my mouth and ask all the important questions that a man can't ask another man, such as

"How do you turn it on?"
"Where are the turn signals?"
"How much gas? How far can it go before you refill the tank?"
"Are those the gears?"
and, the most important one: "Is this a good bike to learn how to ride on? or is it too dangerous for a beginner?"

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha. Alpha puppies. I trained them all....

Now, I have to go ask another Alpha man to teach this Alpha man how to ride a beast. Of course I have to go along. I'm going to be the one asking the RIGHT DIRECTIONS to operate the machine while the males do their alpha grunts and signals. Tsk.

As you can see, Alpha men just can't admit they don't know how. You know I'm going to have to find a way to insert this scene into a book! Maybe Cucumber...hmm...he's going to need a Big Bike.

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All The Clocks Are Wrong

This time change stuff is messing me up! Grrr. It gets darker earlier now, so I have to get to work earlier to catch that extra hour of sunlight. So, blogging becomes a nighttime chore, except that I'm exhausted, my feet feel like they are five times their normal size, and my brain is not willing to think about interesting blog topics after running around on the roof.

I admire writers who work during the day and write at night after their job. How do you do it? My brain is dead by then. Mahjong calleth.

Do you find, as you grow older, that this annual time change is bothersome to the body, mind and spirit? Or is it just me? ;-) It doesn't seem to affect the furbabees. Anytime is snack time. That extra night-hour gives me the munchies...all I do is look for snacks. (ICHIBAN, SQ! Heh)

So did you have a good Halloween? Did you dress up? What was the best costume you saw?

I looked up a St. Fermin (running of the bulls) article for RB to unconvince him about this new "adventure." It's called The Tip Of The Horn and is written by someone who actually ran with the bulls. He had some good advice, but mostly, he was trying to show what a foolhardy thing to do it is ;-). Very interesting article, and I learned a lot about St. Fermin, but it reminded me when one of the Beatles said on TV, "Don't do drugs. It's really bad for you." I was, like, yeah...do as I say but not as I do.

Anyway, didn't scare RB off at all, especially the part where it says that "after a run, most people feel like they can lift huge oak trees out of the ground by their trunks." LOL. That just perked the man right up. "Oh yeah, that's the feeling I'm looking for..."

Sigh. Why couldn't he just buy a nice sports convertible, huh?

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Sad Note

I'm sorry to find out today that Anne Weale (Andrea Blake), one of the Grande Dames of romance, passed away Oct. 24. She wrote 88 books, the first one published in 1955. Anne Weale was one of the first Mills and Boon (Presents) authors I read when I was eleven or twelve. I always loved her island settings, which was so romantic and exotic to me.

She was one of the founders of the Romantic Novelists Association (RNA). Never a shy voice, she kept an interesting blog with quite a few controversial postings in the past years, called Book Worm On The Net. You can click on the link and post your condolences at the last entry dated Sept. 13, 2007.

Here's a short Romance Wiki on Anne Weale. My prayers and condolences to Ms. Weale's family and close friends.

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